ho-hum

Why am I so blase? So uncaring and hard-pressed to smile?

This is a little, or quite, dramatic.

When my day is scheduled out for me I am productive and efficient. I am successful and good at what I do. I am happy. I get home from work and I am more than content, I am happy.

When I have an unscheduled day, an unscheduled evening, or even an unscheduled hour-- I am lost. I am, well, worthless. This could be construed as dramatic, yet again, but it's true. I had 1 hour today, during which, I was to go to a cafe so that I could complete work- work that was due later today. I parked my car and slept.

I have due dates for too many tasks. Thesis sections. Research. Emails. Grade posting. Client updates and programming. Research visits and assignments. and on and on and on. With due dates. Dates that are checked on weekly.

I have time to work on these specific tasks on my to do list. I make it to scheduled meetings and classes and report that each of these tasks is "in progress." A partial lie.

That's all for today. I don't have much to write about without my Eliza girl around.